Wellness girls obsess over hitting protein goals, walking 10,000 steps a day, and improving sleep scores with mouth tape and mocktails. But what if the secret to better well-being was not just in your diet, food, or sleep habits, but in your happy hormones? Finland’s best-selling author, physician, and self-proclaimed “Love Doctor,” Dr. Emilia Vuorisalmi, M.D., has done years of research on what she calls the love hormone power trio: dopamine, serotonin, and oxytocin. You may be familiar with these hormones when we talk about pleasure (dopamine), mood (serotonin), or even love (oxytocin), but according to Dr. Vuorisalmi, that’s only scratching the surface of what the “happy hormones” impact.
These three neuromodulators (chemical messengers in the brain) don’t just influence your emotions; they also regulate other hormones like cortisol (the stress hormone), insulin, thyroid hormones, and even your sex hormones like estrogen and testosterone. In other words, when these three hormones are in balance, you’ve got the biochemical foundation for both emotional and physical well-being. And the best part is you can “hack” them daily to create more joy and well-being in your life. Let the Love Doctor teach you how.
Dr. Emilia Vuorisalmi, M.D., Author and Physician
With a unique blend of cutting-edge science and practical tools, Dr. Emilia Vuorisalmi’s work has transformed the lives of thousands worldwide. Through her bestselling book The Healing Power of Hormones and her online courses, Dr. Vuorisalmi shares actionable steps to help you reduce stress, boost energy, and reconnect with yourself and others.
Dopamine: “The Gas Pedal”
Dopamine is your driver every single day. It fuels motivation, direction, reward, and pleasure. It’s behind almost every action you take, from rolling out of bed to starting a business. That little hit of “yes, this feels good” when you accomplish something or anticipate a reward? That’s dopamine. But it has a shadow side, too, the kind that traps you in a spiral of addiction through quick, temporary bursts of meaning and purpose. Unfortunately, our modern world is currently built to hijack our dopamine levels. Think endless doomscrolling, constant notifications, and rapid-fire dating apps. Every sales and marketing plan is, quite honestly, designed to create a short-lived happy hormone surge. When dopamine peaks too often, it lowers your baseline, making it harder to feel happy without constant stimulation.
Do we need to cut out these quick dopamine hits cold turkey? Kind of. Dr. Vuorisalmi recommends making small tweaks like limiting your screen time, leaving some days without plans, and allowing yourself to sit in the silence and feel uncomfortable. That discomfort is actually part of the hormone cycle itself and key to the more stable long-term dopamine. “We are built for seeking; we need to feel uncomfortable and work hard for meaningful things,” writes Dr. Vuorisalmi in her book The Healing Power of Hormones. Dr. Vuorisalmi notes that a healthy baseline isn’t about dopamine stacking (doing a million things that make you happy); it’s about letting yourself be bored. We need that emptiness to daydream, to wonder, and to take ourselves seriously.
How to boost it IRL:
- Sustainable hits over quick spikes: Instead of chasing instant rewards like sugar or endless scrolling, focus on habits that give you steady, lasting dopamine (like accomplishing a goal, exercise, creative pursuits). And don’t bundle pleasures together, like watching a movie while scrolling Instagram and eating chocolate. Give each joy its own moment.
- Dr. Vuorisalmi’s morning routine combo: She swears by morning cold showers while humming. “Humming connects me with myself and calms racing thoughts,” she said.
- Break big goals into smaller steps: Checking things off more frequently keeps dopamine flowing without the burnout.
- Learn something new: Whether it’s a language, cooking style, or dance class, novelty naturally stimulates dopamine. Humans are creative beings, and our brains need to be continuously fed, however that might look for you.
- Celebrate small wins: Don’t just move on to the next thing; pause to acknowledge your progress for more consistent dopamine hits.
- Dream for the future: Try to write yourself a letter from the future. Think about your dreams and desires. Take them seriously. You can write your goal on a sticky note or make a vision board.
- Eat lots of berries: Berries can be beneficial for dopamine levels due to their rich content of antioxidants and specific compounds like pterostilbene, which may enhance dopamine production.
Serotonin: “The Brakes”
If dopamine is your gas pedal, serotonin is the brakes. It’s the neurochemical that brings emotional stability, long-term well-being, and a deep sense of inner safety. When serotonin is balanced, you feel grounded, content, and resilient, not just coasting through life, but moving from a place of calm clarity. Serotonin is also what gives you the energy to grow, repair, and heal. It’s the hormone that allows your body to drop into the “rest-and-digest” state, where recovery happens and your system restores itself. It helps you create that subtle balance between safety and expansion, between knowing you’re protected and feeling ready to explore. It’s a quiet guardian, protecting your energy so you don’t burn out.
On the flip side, low serotonin can feel like mood swings, anxiety, irritability, or a lack of self-worth. You might feel constantly on edge, unable to relax, even when there’s no real threat. That’s because serotonin is deeply connected to your nervous system, and unresolved fears or past trauma can put it into “overprotective mode.” In that state, your body stays hyper-alert, as if danger is around every corner, making it hard to truly rest or trust the moment, even when life is objectively fine. Working with serotonin means nurturing both mind and body: building routines that create safety, incorporating slow and grounding practices, and allowing space for genuine rest. It’s not just about avoiding stress. It’s about cultivating the inner stability that lets you handle whatever comes next.
How to boost it IRL:
- Get daylight: Morning sunlight on your skin and in your eyes helps regulate serotonin and your circadian rhythm.
- Eat tryptophan-rich foods: Turkey, salmon, oats, eggs, and seeds all support serotonin production.
- Move gently: Pair light exposure with a walk or yoga session for a double boost.
- Do trauma work: Practices like EFT tapping, therapy, or breathwork can release old patterns that block serotonin flow.
- Sauna sessions: Dr. Vuorisalmi calls the sauna her “serotonin sanctuary,” a place of warmth, stillness, and safety that shifts the body out of stress mode.
Oxytocin: “The Glue”
Oxytocin is the connection hormone. It’s what makes you feel safe in someone’s presence, what allows you to let your guard down and actually be seen. It fosters trust, empathy, and intimacy, not just with others, but also with yourself. It’s the glue that helps us bond emotionally, the calming force that regulates stress, and, yes, a key player in sexual satisfaction and the ability to experience pleasure fully. Most people think of oxytocin as the “love” or “cuddle” hormone, tied only to touch or romance. But the truth is you can cultivate it in dozens of everyday, non-romantic ways.
Dr. Vuorisalmi calls gratitude one of the fastest routes to an oxytocin boost. “Even silently listing three things you’re thankful for can create a shift,” she says. Eye contact, playing with pets, sharing experiences, and even hugging a tree can all spark oxytocin release. Oxytocin doesn’t just connect you to others; it reconnects you to your deeper self, creating that quiet, steady sense of belonging in the world.
How to boost it IRL:
- Practice gratitude daily: Write it down or think it through—it works either way.
- Make eye contact: With friends, coworkers, or even strangers in safe contexts.
- Share meals: Eating together stimulates oxytocin naturally.
- Play with pets: Petting or cuddling animals can create a surge in oxytocin.
- Hug a tree: Yes, really. Dr. Vuorisalmi swears by it. It’s a grounding, sensory experience that sparks connection.
- Sweat together: Whether it’s a sauna session or a workout, shared physical experiences boost both oxytocin and dopamine.
- Music: Listening to or making music you love boosts oxytocin.
Turning Emotional Hygiene Into a Daily Practice
Just like brushing your teeth, emotional hygiene means caring for your inner world every single day. It’s about processing your feelings rather than letting them pile up, setting boundaries that protect your energy, staying connected to yourself, and making time for joy. If you let it slide, your hormones can get just as out of whack as they would from poor sleep or diet.
Dr. Vuorisalmi’s simplest prescription is to build in a five-minute mindful pause each day with the four-to-six breathing pattern: inhale through your nose for four seconds and exhale slowly for six. “This activates the parasympathetic nervous system, lowers cortisol, and lets dopamine, serotonin, and oxytocin flow more freely,” she says. While you breathe, check in: How do I feel right now? What do I need? This short, consistent practice helps you stop stress from spiraling, deepens your connection to yourself, and creates the mental space your body needs to rebalance.
Angelika Pokovba, Contributing Writer
Angelika is an avid traveler and wellness enthusiast from New York City who lives in Tulum, Mexico, and speaks six languages. Her deep connection to nature influences all her decisions, driving her to explore unique destinations and discover hidden gems. From curating curiosities to delving into cosmologies, she finds inspiration in the world’s little-known wonders.
The post Meet the “Love Doctor” Helping People Hack Their Happy Hormones appeared first on The Everygirl.
Source: Cosmo Politian
